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  #61  
Old 06-07-2018, 09:35 AM
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Relax, i added additional clarification for people like you who can't tell which part was hyperbole for funz. You can go clear up confusion in other threads now, your work here is done. Hopefully you saved the day before anyone had additional eyeballs surgically implanted so they could make simultaneous eye contact with multiple people.
You're off to a great start, I look forward to the next installment
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  #62  
Old 06-07-2018, 09:47 AM
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You're off to a great start, I look forward to the next installment
I'm sensing sarcasm.
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  #63  
Old 06-07-2018, 10:39 AM
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Sadly, your advice probably works well for senior management (D bands and up). Hopefully some day it won't work at any level.

Maybe you should have posted in the NAT.
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  #64  
Old 06-07-2018, 11:08 AM
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Sadly, your advice probably works well for senior management (D bands and up). Hopefully some day it won't work at any level.

Maybe you should have posted in the NAT.
Why NAT, you just said it works.
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  #65  
Old 06-07-2018, 11:26 AM
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I'll dumb it down for some of our slower participants:

1. Body language, sitting standing, proper posture, etc. Google it. Use what you learn.
2. Eye contact: don't be scared of it. Look people in the eye. Pay particular attention to the most important person in the room.
3. Don't block the CEO's path of be openly disdainful of higher ups. That part was a joke. I assumed everyone knew that but I guess not.
4. Show up on time to stuff
5. Minimize unproductive idle chatter
6. Speak with confidence; being confident is often better than hedging even if your not 100% sure of something
7. Don't be tempted to fill silence unnecessarily; let the other person do it. Listening is better than talking.
8. And most importantly: If you can't handle this stuff without coming across like an assh0le because you can't figure out which parts might be valuable to you then don't try.
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I think the dollar will crash irreparably by 2012.... bottom drops out of the dollar. ....Dollars are worthless, 401ks are bust, the markets are valueless...government assumes control over all industry and everything is nationalized by the end of 2012. - gomer_tree
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  #66  
Old 06-07-2018, 11:36 AM
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It's not silly, it solid advice.
I agree that it is good advice, especially for those that aren't the most knowledgeable but still want to be perceived as more important.

-Riley
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  #67  
Old 06-07-2018, 12:05 PM
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6. Speak with confidence; being confident is often better than hedging even if your not 100% sure of something.
Corollary - Don't be afraid to not have an answer. Say you don't have an answer at the moment but will get it. I hate people who confidently make up shit because they don't actually know and tell me complete crap that I know is wrong.
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  #68  
Old 06-07-2018, 12:15 PM
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Corollary - Don't be afraid to not have an answer. Say you don't have an answer at the moment but will get it. I hate people who confidently make up shit because they don't actually know and tell me complete crap that I know is wrong.
In particular, listen to TDA when you're *the expert* in the room. If you're in a room full of experts on the topic, following TDA's advice can get you into messiness.

In general, TDA's stuff is good advice, but unfortunately most people that need the advice can't pull it off. You can go through Sean Archer's old threads to see the disaster that happens when people don't have this in them and try to fake their way through it.

Good stuff tho.
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  #69  
Old 06-07-2018, 01:05 PM
CowboyGuy CowboyGuy is offline
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OK, totally forgot to mention something: Speak with confidence. If you have naturally whiney or nasaly voice, make a conscious effort to reduce those qualities. But more important, tone of voice: confidence in everything you say. If you aren't sure, just say you don't know with confidence so it comes across like, how the frick would I know that you dumbass? Never apologize for not knowing, or really anything else for that matter. But especially not something like, "I'm sorry I don't have that figure with me". Two choices: (1) make something up you know it reasonable and no one is going to check anyway (again, say it with confidence, don't give a range, don't say "i think it's about 10%". Say, with your strongest voice, "it's 9%". Then stop talking.) (2) other option - "I don't know" then silence. Say it with confidence. That's right, you are confident that you don't know. And why would you know? Even if it's something you should know you don't care right now. You don't even know your own birthday and it will be fine if you are confident about it. Hopefully your're not that much of a dumbass because eventually you will be fired if you are that clueless though.

This brings me to another piece of golden advice if you want to be a baller. Silence is golden. Do not be tempted to fill the silence, especially in any kind of negotiation. People have a natural tendency to do this so let the other person do it. The more they talk and the less you do the more power you have. Trust me on this, it works.

I'm going to update the OP I think.

Anywhoo, don't let the sometimes humorous tone of my original post lessen the lesson. Body language, eye contact, showing up on time, minimizing chit chat, etc are all good advices. Don't let the haterz in this thread make you think otherwise.
Amazing, amazing, amazing!

After reading your OP, I was actually about to ask you to post your advice on the "speaking" part. Although I'm pretty good at eye contact, power positions etc, unfortunately I suck at this part and need to improve it.

I have some questions though.

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(2) other option - "I don't know" then silence. Say it with confidence.
Won't you come out as either too arrogant or too dumb if you plainly say "I don't know" and then silence?

Also, if someone doesn't pull off some of your advice perfectly, I feel like they may appear like complete jerk. Do you agree? A small example is saying "I don't know" without a confident voice.

Finally, do you have more to share on the "speaking" part? I think that part deserves its own thread or at least a detailed post, with clarifications for donkeys like me.
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  #70  
Old 06-07-2018, 01:58 PM
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Amazing, amazing, amazing!

After reading your OP, I was actually about to ask you to post your advice on the "speaking" part. Although I'm pretty good at eye contact, power positions etc, unfortunately I suck at this part and need to improve it.

I have some questions though.



Won't you come out as either too arrogant or too dumb if you plainly say "I don't know" and then silence?

Also, if someone doesn't pull off some of your advice perfectly, I feel like they may appear like complete jerk. Do you agree? A small example is saying "I don't know" without a confident voice.

Finally, do you have more to share on the "speaking" part? I think that part deserves its own thread or at least a detailed post, with clarifications for donkeys like me.
This is an excellent post. Mostly because, while I'm pretty sure you are trolling me, i'm not 100% sure. So well done. But also because, regardless of whether you are trolling or not, these are excellent points for clarification that I will address because they might help someone.

As for appearing to dumb or too arrogant...look, all of this assumes you are good at your job. Like, you know your shit. If you are asked about something and it's really something you really should know in that moment then that's a problem. You don't have to quote me exactly but my opinion on miminmizing the problem is to to own up to now knowing in confidence. DOn't apologize. Instead of "I don't know" you can say "I don't have that information available at the moment" or "we'll have that metric at the close of the quarter next week". If you want to say "I'll get that right after the meeting" go ahead. The point is, don't linger on it, "oh shoot, i meant to bring that, sorry about that, gosh I think it's 5.7% but I might be thinking of that other report and it might be 7.5% so let me see if I can get it after the meeting and email everyone would that be ok, really sorry about that."


If it's something you really aren't in a position to know and someone asks you anyway, then you can say 'my department doesn't have access to that information and never has". So you've made the questioner look like a dumbass for asking you and not you for not knowing.

I mean, feel free to get creative.

Do you have specific questions about 'the speaking part"? I'm not sure what else you mean. Confidence, listening mode, make your voice deeper, eye contact.
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