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Old 02-11-2018, 06:50 PM
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Default Did I mention that I'm morbidly depressed?

Please indulge my attention seeking behavior this week and perhaps for the remainder of the study season.

Jan/Feb 2018 items of note:
  • I just skipped a 3 year old's birthday party, that would have included seeing most of my closest girlfriends, because nope
  • I'm not really interested in the hours of the day that occur between naps
  • I've been increasingly working from home at my own discretion, because meh
  • It's taken everything in my power to not just run to the nurse to up my meds and fix it, which wasn't a lot of will power, because, well... I like to put off / avoid completely things like scheduling appointments at times such as this
  • It being the dead of winter and having to study in an isolated fashion is not making things any easier

Is this topic too taboo for you folks? I'm sort of an advocate for talking openly on the topic of mental illness. And of course by that I mean that I really have no shame.

Actually, it feels kind of nice to write this down.
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Old 02-11-2018, 07:01 PM
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I've found that money solves most problems. So once you pass your exam, you'll get more money, and more free time, which will knock off a couple of bullet points on that list of yours.

Oh, but more seriously, remember that while openly talking about your mental health certainly helps, it's up to you solve your problems and to ultimately find happiness in life. Nobody else is going to do that for you.
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Old 02-11-2018, 07:03 PM
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None of that sounds healthy (except the parts of openly talking and feeling better after writing things down) I hope you do more than just write things down. Life can be a much better place and I hope you get there.
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Old 02-11-2018, 07:15 PM
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I've found that money solves most problems. So once you pass your exam, you'll get more money, and more free time, which will knock off a couple of bullet points on that list of yours.

Oh, but more seriously, remember that while openly talking about your mental health certainly helps, it's up to you solve your problems and to ultimately find happiness in life. Nobody else is going to do that for you.
I don't disagree with any of that. Although I'm not really the breadwinner in my current setup, so the marginal utility of more cash is quickly decreasing.

Also, the idea of having more free time in the near feature isn't as appealing to me as it should be.
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Old 02-11-2018, 07:15 PM
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sorry tiff, it sucks. i feel depressed pretty often too.
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Old 02-11-2018, 07:16 PM
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saying that money from passing an exam will make you happy is dumb.
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Old 02-11-2018, 07:22 PM
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None of that sounds healthy (except the parts of openly talking and feeling better after writing things down) I hope you do more than just write things down. Life can be a much better place and I hope you get there.
I do a lot of the things, yes.
  • The meds have been working really, really well for a good year or so.
  • Me and my shrink are bros.
  • I have multiple adult coloring books, spend hours lounging in baths, do other relaxing shit..

I have subsequently fallen into a rut this month and I have absolutely no desire to do anything about it.

I give it a 85% chance just getting off my ass and going to yoga again will solve it. Is anybody willing to carry me there?
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Old 02-11-2018, 07:30 PM
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sorry tiff, it sucks. i feel depressed pretty often too.
Interesting tidbit.. when I went nuts last year and finally sought treatment, I did it because of anxiety. I had absolutely ZERO clue that I was depressed. Then when the meds wore off the first couple of times, I was like, wtf is this? AM I DEPRESSED?!?

People around me are now like, yeah, we knew. Why TF doesn't anyone tell you these things?!
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Old 02-11-2018, 07:32 PM
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sorry tiff, it sucks. i feel depressed pretty often too.
Not an expert in anything but this response sounds about right.

Be kind to yourself--you deserve the best.
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Old 02-11-2018, 07:37 PM
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keep fighting the good fight.
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