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#101
11-19-2004, 09:48 AM
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if it has to be explained, then it's not that good of a joke
__________________
Official Poster of Post 1,234,567 Quote:
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#102
11-19-2004, 10:12 AM
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 I didn't make up the joke...and I got it with out it being explained...
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#103
11-19-2004, 02:03 PM
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A man goes to the doctor to get some male enhancement. The doctor says, "Have you seen those Smiling Bob commercials? Maybe you should try that."
The man replies, "That didn't work as advertised." The doctor says, "The only other option is a transplant." The man says, "OK, what do you have?" The doctor brings out a donated organ, but the man says, "That's not much more than I've got already." The doctor brings out another, the man say, no its still too small So, the doctor brings out a whole box full, the man looks through them, shaking his head, no, not what I want. The doctor say, wait a minute, and brings out another box. The man starts to smile, these are fantastic, its almost exactly what I wanted. Pointing at one he says: That's the style I want, but can I see it in white.
__________________
"I've been through the desert on a horse with no name... In the desert you can remember your name 'Cause there ain't no one for to give you no pain"
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#104
11-22-2004, 07:56 PM
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There was a guy who was struggling to decide what to wear to go to a fancy costume party... Then he had a bright idea. When the host answered the door, he found the guy standing there with no shirt and no socks on. "What the hell are you supposed to be?" asked the host. "Premature ejaculation," said the man. "I just came in my pants!"
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ಠ_ಠ -- JB is watching you... ................"Don't let 'em talk bad about you!" Due to my strong personal convictions, I wish to stress that this post in no way endorses a belief in the occult.
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#105
11-22-2004, 08:38 PM
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Wowy Cowsy.
Get it? Cow disease! 
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"There are 100,000 total marijuana smokers in the US, and most are Negroes, Hispanics, Filipinos and entertainers. Their Satanic music, jazz and swing, result from marijuana usage. This marijuana causes white women to seek sexual relations with Negroes, entertainers and any others." - Harry Anslinger, testifying to Congress, 1937
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#107
11-23-2004, 01:41 PM
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Quote:
Think about it, bro.
__________________
"There are 100,000 total marijuana smokers in the US, and most are Negroes, Hispanics, Filipinos and entertainers. Their Satanic music, jazz and swing, result from marijuana usage. This marijuana causes white women to seek sexual relations with Negroes, entertainers and any others." - Harry Anslinger, testifying to Congress, 1937
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#108
11-23-2004, 02:08 PM
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Quote:
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#109
11-23-2004, 03:09 PM
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A police officer pulls over a speeding car. The officer says, I clocked you at 80 miles per hour, sir."
The driver says, "Gee, officer I had it on cruise control at 60 perhaps your radar gun needs calibrating. Not looking up from her knitting the wife says: "Now don't be silly dear, you know that this car doesn't have cruise control" As the officer writes out the ticket, the driver looks over at his wife and growls, "Can't you please keep your mouth shut for once?" The wife smiles demurely and says, "You should be thankful your radar detector went off when it did." As the officer makes out the second ticket for the illegal radar detector unit, the man glowers at his wife and says through clenched teeth, "Darn it, woman, can't you keep your mouth shut?" The officer frowns and says, "And I notice that you're not wearing your seat belt, sir. That's an automatic $75 fine." The driver says, "Yeah, well, you see officer, I had it on, but took it off when you pulled me over so that I could get my license out of my back pocket." The wife says, "Now, dear, you know very well that you didn't have your seat belt on. You never wear your seat belt when you're driving." And as the police officer is writing out the third ticket the driver turns to his wife and barks, "WHY DON'T YOU PLEASE SHUT UP??" The officer looks over at the woman and asks, "Does your husband always talk to you this way, Ma'am?" "No sir not always.....only when he's been drinking."
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#110
11-23-2004, 03:22 PM
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3 guys are describing their worst drinking experience:
The first guy says he had so much to drink that when he got home he blew chunks. The second guy says he got so drunk that he totaled his brand new BMW. The third guy says he got so drunk he woke up to discover he had sex with his hairy, smelly mother-in-law. The first guy says you don’t understand “Chunks” is my dog!
__________________
'Diplomacy is the art of saying 'Nice Doggie!' till you can find a rock'
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